Scene: A Pretty Hot Dude is dousing himself suggestively with cologne while practicing his smile in the mirror.
Movie Announcer Voice:
Tom has got a Hot Date.
Cut to: Dreamy memory from earlier that day. Tom sees an Attractive Woman (we know that she is attractive because she has a low cut top, is thin, and in her early 20′s), and smiles at her while waggling his eyebrows. He approaches her, and both smile.
Tom: See you then!
(Echo: then! then! then!)
Cut to: Tom arrives at a trendy restaurant / lounge. He is still smiling. After looking around, he realizes that Attractive Lady is not there yet. So he gets a table.
Cut to: Several hours later. The restaurant is empty, Tom is surrounded by empty bottles of wine.
Announcer Guy : But Tom forgot something important… which restaurant they had decided!
(Tom bursts into tears)
Cut to: Kathryn, looking Congenial. Her hands are covered in various notes written with Sharpies.
Kathryn: Hi. I’m internationally famous author, Kathryn Hogan. Don’t let what happened to Tom happen to you. Instead, buy my patent-pending Sharpie Self Management System. With only two easy payments of $29.99, you’ll receive A Sharpie, and and Emergency Back Up Sharpie.
Kathryn’s facial expression shifts to one of playful suggestiveness.
Kathryn: What you do with them… IS UP TO YOU!!!!
Kathryn looks at her hand.
Kathryn: Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a Hot Date, and I KNOW that I’m not going to miss it!
