I wrote a sassy advice column yesterday about the internet possibly developing sentience and, according to science fiction, either becoming totally scary and murderous or totally sexy.

Clearly, we are hoping for the latter here.

<--This is good. Well, sure, she starts out sort of murderous and is responsible for the deaths of everyone in the 12 colonies, but other than that she's totally great. This is bad-->

… Really bad.

Which is why we need to take action now.
If you didn’t guess from the title, I’m talking about some Serious Robot Porn.

There are two kinds of Robot Porn (notice the capital letters. that’s how you know it’s Serious) that we need to consider here.

1. Porn For Robots

If you think that this is a totally new frontier of writing, then you are correct. I am going where no one has gone before, and I’m doing it for the future of the human race.

What kind of porn do robots want? Are there subgenres, like humans have? Or taboos, like robots fantasizing about appliances? (The toaster looked innocent sitting on the counter, gossiping with the coffee machine. But SmartPhone knew that looks could be deceiving. Whirring with excitement, SmartPhone accessed its memory logs from the previous evening, when Toaster had, in a very sensual way, popped.)

Obviously, this literary phenomenon is much bigger than I, a humble robot pornography enthusiast. This movement is bigger than all of us, I think.

2. Porn Including Robots

Coincidentally, I found an awesome ebook descriptively titled Love Machine by Electra Shepherd in the Kindle Store. I obviously started reading it right away.

Sure enough, this is basically porn (the fancy word for porn is Erotica) about a lady and a robot.

Which is frickin’ awesome.

I love the premise of the book, I love the downplayed emotions of the characters, and I love the simple storyline so far: Lady gets some robot lovin’, Robot wants to go All The Way, Lady helps robot get equipped with man parts.

THAT IS THE KIND OF ROBOT THAT WE WANT IN THE FUTURE!